The partners might not know what to do when they go into couples counseling. The partners are probably in a situation of crisis. They may have turned to an impartial third person to help establish healthier relationship patterns. Many married couples and other long-term partnerships develop unhealthy patterns which can be very difficult to break, read more.
Many destructive habits come from the childhood of each partner. Man may be angry if his father was violent. In the case of a woman with a father who wasn’t around, she could choose a man who doesn’t care about her. A lot of people will choose a partner to help them work out problems from their past. This is why many people divorced choose another partner. These people are trying to make past issues right and feel familiar. The problems could be solved through counseling.
It is possible that each partner will wonder if the best approach would be to consult with a counselor independently or jointly. It’s a good question. Since each has pros and disadvantages, combining both approaches may offer the best results.
Everyone is Welcome
While both partners will be able to work through issues with the counselor together, and even discuss them together as one front, therapists can watch how the pair interact and gain great insight. It is important that both partners meet with their counselor. Not only can they work on issues together and discuss them as a united front, but the therapist also gets to observe the interaction and gain insight into the dynamics. People don’t always hear what they say or how they act. It can be eye-opening for them to watch the video footage.
Having them each take turns to go to the therapist will allow for each partner to be able to privately say things he orshe might not feel comfortable with saying in front their spouse or partner. This makes it easier to present difficult topics. For example, if a husband and wife are scared of each other or do not wish to hurt one another’s feelings they will likely avoid discussing this with their spouse.
This method allows each participant to spend 15 minutes talking with the therapist. You can have a lot of interactions with this method. While it would be difficult to have a long-term individual session, periodic appointments could make this work.